Happy New Year!!!

I recently turned 32 on November 2nd. Yeah I know I still look 25 and I thank God for my stunning, youthful, vibrant, gorgeous, fabulous looks. But besides that all that I am thankful to see another new year. I am known to tell people happy new year on their birthday and sometimes the statement confuses them. You see I don't celebrate a new year on January 1st, I believe that your new year begins on the day that you were born. Every year on my birthday I take a look back and reflect where I've come from to where I currently am. A year ago I made the decision to pursue my dreams and believe what God has called me to be and become and entrepreneur. I had a plan and it seemed to come all together so well. Life was good! I was in my own house, driving my own car, a full time student at A&T State University pursuing my masters in Speech Pathology and working my own business. My faith was the strongest I've ever known it to be and nothing could have stop me but God Himself! I was going into my new year on the biggest high ever. I had poured every ounce of money I had into the start up of my business and was looking at a bright future. But on August 5, 2011 my life was changed drastically. A flash flood came out of no where and destroyed everything I invested into my business, I lost EVERYTHING.

I went through a whole year trying to figure out how could God let this happen to me when I was following His command. As my Bishop would say "How do you handle it when the God you serve leads you into a wilderness?" Even in my wilderness I still had to be the same Jessica that everyone saw. Happy, full of life a go getter but inside I was empty and fearful. How can I be an inspiration to others when I felt like I had nothing to offer because I had lost everything. Little did I know that my journey of recovery inspired those around me to never give up and the KEEP GOING! I've learned that the path that God wants us to take to get us to an expected end is not the path we would have chosen.  My journey in this last year has taught me about faith, love and compassion on a whole other level. I've learned that PAIN births COMPASSION that cultivated my FAITH to truly see the LOVE of God for my life.  What I went through helped me to understand the struggle that God's people go through and have compassion for them and their process. This stirred my faith in the love of God and His promise to never leave me nor forsake me. 

Even though I lost all of my possessions I have truly gained my true self. And I would not change a thing about my journey. So this new year the only thing I am seeking is God to get the glory out of my life and for YOU to be inspired to KEEP GOING!

The Gift of Being Different!

As a kid I was always the odd ball.  The youngest of three (the cutest), full of energy but different. My brother and sister were the absolute greatest things ever in my life because they were popular. I mean they were "Michele's Kids" that meant something to me growing up. My sister was the pretty popular girl who could sing, dance and was always chosen to go with some jock to prom or a military ball. My brother was the singing Casanova. He was in all the talent shows, Boy Scouts and was friends with EVERYBODY! There was no one I knew that didn't know my brother. Then there was me, spitting image of my mother, chunky, cute smile but last to be picked.  I remember hiding a  lot because I thought that I was not smart enough, too fat and not as pretty as my other siblings.  As I got older I began to see myself through God's eyes and realized that I could accomplish anything I set my mind to. This video is a testament of my growth. I hope that you come away inspired and knowing without a shadow of a doubt that you are a GIFT! All faith, no fear, KEEP GOING!

Where's the Spoon? Aha Aha!

I love movies and I'm guilty of watching them all the way through till the last credit rolls. One of my favorite movies is Coming to America. And one of my favorite scenes is at the end where the Jewish guy played by Eddie Murphy tells a joke called "Where's the Spoon"? There was a simple question asked by the customer for the waiter to taste the soup. In suspense the waiter kept asking is the soup too hot, too cold what is it? He finally says I'll taste the soup but "Where's the spoon"? Then the Jewish guy waves his finger in the air as if a light bulb came on and says Aha, Aha! I laugh until I cry because the joke isn't funny.  But it made me think about those moments when the light bulb in your head comes on to ask the right question to get the answer you've been looking for from God.

This past year has been a challenge in more ways than I can explain. Being in a trial or a crisis is not a good feeling to say the least but it’s a part of the life we were blessed with. As the church would say “a faith that’s not tested is a faith that can’t be trusted”. But the question still remains why must we go through? Some say it’s to humble us, to see who we really are. Others say it’s to mature us or we are going through to help someone else. I’ve experienced each of these revelations but this time around I could not see what I was supposed to learn. As I prayed and stayed faithful through the process I began to get weary. Losing possessions, business slowing down and financial challenges I began to ask WHY ME LORD? I know everyone has had a “Why ME Lord”moment in their life, if not keep living.

I got to the point where I felt completely empty and not like myself. With my praying, always believing, bulldog faith having, put a smile on your face self. I, Jessica Shanelle Macks could not see myself anymore. It wasn’t until I felt like I lost everything and had nothing to offer when I learned what this whole trial was about. You see once I felt like I had nothing to offer that’s when I discovered that jewel of a gift I’ve always had inside of me. My friends and family would see it but I couldn’t see it until now. You see the less possessions and tangible value I had the more I realized my precious value inside of me. I saw me through the eyes of God. Something as simple as tasting the soup but not having the spoon helps you to see that the smallest thing matters. That's how God sees you! It may not be valuable to you or anyone else but it means the world to Him.  This week why don't you just taste the soup, but first get a spoon! Aha....... Aha!!! LOL

Better Days Ahead!

This morning I woke up with a renewed spirit. I know that it sounds cliche'ish but it's the truth! We all have moments where we do not feel like ourselves and we wonder how in the world did we get to this place. Yesterday as I was preparing to go to worship I whispered to God and said " Dad, I just don't feel like my old self anymore". Right there in those moments when you feel empty and are down to nothing God sends a word to rejuvenate your spirit. This morning I felt like a brand new/old person. I feel like myself again. Today be encouraged because better days are ahead.

Better Days!

What's Next Jess?

It's been a few weeks since I've stepped out on faith and chased a dream of mine. Being back home in New York was the best feeling ever. With all the support from my JSW Media Group team, friends and family, words can not explain how much I appreciate you all. Being in that moment and time while facing some adversities really opened my eyes to how much I am loved and supported. The question that has been asked repeatedly after my New York trip is, what's next Jess? To be honest with you I have no idea what's next. Is that answer ok? I say that because for a minute it wasn't ok with me. I've always been the one who had a plan, knew what to do and had a back up plan when the others failed. But today I have to put all my trust in the one who created this life of mine. So it's ok not to know what's next or all of the details of God's plan for your life, just trust Him. So the answer to your question is I don't know but I am expecting something GREAT!

Don't Curse Your Process!

I don't know about anyone else but I feel as if I am on this train running 100 miles an hour and I have no control over it. I have the twins as my passenger's (Grace & Mercy) and you know who in the driver seat. Well if you don't know let me introduce you to I AM. (Exodus 3:14) Within the past two weeks I've had things revealed to me that changed my life and even today more is being poured into me. This morning as I was getting ready for church I thought about my week and how God showed me the meaning of validation (see my last blog) I wanted to know what was next, what was I suppose to do with this TRUTH? It seemed that the truth that was revealed felt like a big fat piece of stake that you just don't know how to consume. So you just look at it and hold your knife and fork in hand ready to eat but in a paused position.

Paused (II) A temporary stop................
Play (>) Resume

OK I'm back now! So as I go through my preparation for worship God began to speak to me and said "even though the truth has been revealed to you, you must let go of what was and take hold of what is! Not to say that what you believed to be true then wasn't true, but it isn't your truth now. So leave whats old, past, dead, not needed alone and embrace the truth of your new beginning." Embrace you say? Take hold, grasp it and don't let go. I'm like a pit bull that has a lock on something and wont let go until my master tells me. OK God I can do this, I can! So now I am walking in faith in my I AMness! I am who He says that I am and what do you know the enemy shows up and tries his very best to make me think differently. But I had a thought as soon as he tried to get me to speak against the word of God, THIS IS JUST A TEST! Aha! You see the process that I am in now is just for me and I am flying through things faster than I thought I would ever go. You see when overflow hits you, you can't prepare for it. (Thanks Lance!)

We've waited we've prayed, fasted, deleted phone numbers, changed our address just so that we can prepare for this moment. Now that the moment has arrived now what? Here comes the test. God never promised that all blessings would never come without a challenge, we just know that we WIN. Immediately I took the stance of seeking instead of reacting and I felt my faith increase. Even though I wanted to react I didn't. The enemy wants you to think that you have to fight for whats already yours, but I know that to be a lie. If God spoke it then that settles it.

So now instead of me cursing the process I thank God for the process. This allows me to grow my supernatural powers beyond measure. Yes I said supernatural powers! God puts His Super with my Natural and BOOM! Can you see my cape? LOL So this week be mindful of those test and allow the Holy Spirit to guide you through the process, Don't Curse Your Process.

Acceptance Why Do We Need It?

I was having a conversation with a friend of mine and I shared with her that I found a young man very attractive and I thought I had a crush. She began to laugh because I was so thrown off by the fact that I was acting like a school girl. Well as soon as she began to laugh I said " No need for me to pursue what I can't have". As I was thinking the thought of being accepted by this young man I spoke out of my mouth that he wouldn't be interested in me. My friend stopped laughing and asked me why do I think that I couldn't have him? I actually thought about what she asked before I answered and I said well because I just don't. I had to ask myself the same question. Why did I speak what I really didn't want or did I really want to be accepted. You see I have always been a beautiful bountiful little girl and I have grown to fit this stature that God has given me. (more to love) As I walk out accepting myself why couldn't I grasp the fact that someone else would accept me the way that I am? I realized at that moment that I still had some issues with acceptance. We are quick to say well if you don't choose me I'll choose myself or I don't need anyone to accept who I am. Is that the real truth? Then why to we fear rejection? You see in my mind I had already cancelled out a possible relationship that could have blossomed into something wonderful. I hit the nail right on the head and said I am afraid of rejection. So I do care if I am accepted or not. This caused me to re-evaluate my perspective on life. If we are accepted by God just the way that we are then why can't we accept the fact that He loves us unconditionally just the way that we are? You see I needed to grasp the truth that I was already accepted before the foundation of this earth, and because of the love of God I can accept others. I went through a heart transplant in the matter of 5 minutes. God renewed my prospective on acceptance and it opened my eyes to a whole other level of love for His people. You see we need acceptance for without it we wont be able to accept ourselves and allow the love of God to create in us a clean heart and new spirit. So if my friend ever brings up my crush again this time I wont speak against my feelings I will just accept them for what they are and learn even the more on how to love. P.S. I will never disclose who he is so don't ask. LOL!